Category Archives: Entertainment

My Super Bowl Commercial Grades

As with the Super Bowl every year, people find themselves glued to the TV for a variety of reasons.  Will the game be epic? Yes.  Will there be another Janet Jackson style slip? Nope.  Will there be a 20 foot lion ridden into the stadium? Surprisingly yes.  Will there be a new superhero created?  Hello….Left Shark.

But one of the things that I enjoy most about Super Bowl season is the ridiculous hype and almost always disappointment when it comes to Super Bowl commercials.  I mean the genius from our friends at Budweiser/Bud Lighthas long since faded after the pinnacle of  “Whaaaaaaaat’s Uuuuuup?” and the “Bud-Wei-Ser Lizards,” but each year I am hopeful that there will be some great entertaining commercials.

And as a pleasant surprise, they were not half bad.  Now to be fair, I grade based off the level I was entertained or emotionally touched during a commercial.  There were quite a few informative ads, like that <<insert generic TV show>> starts next week or that Dunkin Donuts is, ya know, still serving donuts.  In tracking these commercials it led me to more fully understand two things.  One, first impressions are everything.  When you only have a second to give or else risk missing the next commercial you need to go with your gut and move on.  Second, timing is everything.  I was very engaged and excited about being intentional with ranking these commercials this year.  I started off strong.  Grades tended to be higher because there was not a plethora of commercials to compare to and I was anticipating that things would be funny, powerful, and entertaining.  As I progressed through the game I was more going thru the motions and not really taking in the full message.  So long story short, when I make my millions and I need to advertise something I must buy air time in the middle of the first quarter and have many explosions and celebrities.  Or maybe blow up a celebrity.  Or pseudo-celebrity.  Alright, now I am going dark because I am envisioning an ad where the Kardashian’s explode.


In an effort not to have this drag on too much, Here are my top picks.  A full breakdown as they were shown and my un-edited one second decisions are at the bottom.

Top Picks

  1. Jurassic Park Trailer (I mean come on.  Once that music started, it was over)
  2. Dodge
  3. Fiat
  4. Subway Dodgeball
  5. Reebok Cross-Fit
  6. Ted 2
  7. Nationwide- Matt Damon
  8. BMW I3
  9. Snickers
  10. Carnival Cruise Line
  11. Budweiser (Lost puppy and hearing I Would Walk 500 Miles.  Yep, that hit me)
  12. Dove Men
  14. Toyota (Being a Dad)
  15. Always #LikeAGirl
  16. Nationwide- Make Safe Happen
    • Now this needs to come with a caveat.  I am not sure I wanted to see this during an entertainment blitz.  It was depressing, powerful, and made me think of my daughter.  The last thing it made me think of though is Nationwide.

The info below is my chicken scratch in live time.  To keep it honest, nothing has been changed.  Grammatical errors and all.

Subway Dodgeball 8
Reebok cross fit 8
Verizon 4
Pizza Hut 5 (only b/c of crotch hit)
Undatable (TV) 6
One big happy (TV) 3
SpongeBob movie (4)
Chevy truck man comparison (6)
McDonald’s (3)
Blacklist (TV) (7)
SNL (1)
Jurassic park movie (10) (the song did it for me)
Chevy wi-fi (2)
Esurance (5)
**Super Bowl
Toyota (6)
Turbo tax (4)
Game of war (8) I mean come on
Tomorrowland (6)
BMW I3 (8) can you twerk?
Minion movie (7)
Snickers Brady bunch (8)
The voice (2)
Blacklist (6)
Carnival cruise (9)
Skittles arm wrestling (5)
Lexus (3)
T-mobile (1) Kim kardashian
Budweiser 500 miles (9) gets me every time
Nationwide (Mindy project) (8)
Terminator (6)
The night shift (3)
Coca cola happy Internet (7)
Avocados (7.5)
Dig TV show (4)
Fast & furious (7)
Dove men (9)
Allegiance TV show (5)
Doritos (7)
Nissan (8)
Nationwide dead kid (2 and 9)
Weight watcher (7.5)
Weather tech (1)
McDonald’s love (6)
Esurance Breaking bad (6)
Fiat Viagra (8)
Go daddy (5)
Discover (7)
Blacklist explosion (3)
Microsoft prosthetics (6)
Square space w/ Jeff Daniels (3)
**Halftime (10)
Dunkin donuts (2)
UHS (2)
M&T bank (2)
Dr. Z eye doctor (1)
Dunkin donuts (1)
Toyota being a dad (8)
Pitch perfect 2 (7) the Green Bay packers
The today show (2)
AD TV show (4)
Always “like a girl” (9)
Geico push it (1)
Sketchers “Pete in the hall” (6)
The voice gladiator (8)
The blacklist halftime (3)
Ford (1)
Mirabito (1)
Lourdes rehab (1)
Coach USA (1)
Guthrie Hospital (1)
**2nd half
Clash of clans w/ Liam Neeson (7)
Sprint (3)
Lexus Drift (6)
Microsoft (3)
Dodge- Old people (9)- don’t bitch
KIA w/pierce brosnan (5)
Jublia (1)
Heroes Reborn (5) only for curiosity
T-mobile Sarah Silverman (6)
Budweiser (3)
Jeep-this land is your land (6)
SNL (1)
NFL (4)
Honda (2)
Ted 2 (7)
Mophie (5)
Loctite (6)
The Royals (7)
Bud Light – up for whatever (8)
Odyssey (6)
Mercedes (5)
Chicago Fire (4)
The slap TV show (4)
50 shades (-3)
Doritos pigs fly (5)
Jimmy Fallon (3) (3)
Victoria’s Secret (8)
Allegiance TV show (6)